Late Night Thoughts

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i worked my butt off today. legit from waking up to this moment (minus a quick stop by a birthday party that had puppies with kyra. she wouldn't get anywhere near them and then cried when they left. crazy girl.) worked my butt off to get orders to all those wonderful people who support my crazy shenanigans. i am not quite done but closer. but i am never really done. i never actually catch up it feels like. but that's life. and that is ok. it's been an off week. sickness, working hard, distractions. i just feel out of joint. kinda like i want to take my babies and my handsome husband and run away for a bit. but not travel. cause air ports give me anxiety attacks and play a toll on my marriage every single time. the idea of traveling seems great. but that's before you are sprinting down the whole length of the airport with bleeding blisters and holding on to your children and bags that are all cutting off the circulation to your arms for dear life muttering all sorts of made up profanities and trying not to cry cause you are sure someone will report you for looking clinically insane. anyways. so no airports. but something.

my baby turns six months tomorrow. half a year he has been here. two kids has been interesting. but a life without Brock isn't nearly as good as a life with him in it. and seeing Kyra make him laugh is possibly the best thing this world has to offer. i hope they always do that. make each other laugh. those two need each other. and man do i need them.